How to carve time out for art & get past creative guilt
Let me start by saying I love this topic. With time being something we often feel we are scraping the barrel for and guilt being something we like to carry around like a hiking backpack - how do we find the time for art? It’s real, it’s relatable and something even professionals struggle with when trying to create new work projects or even just play with and explore a new medium. I’ve always professed that I believe 70% of breakthroughs in your painting and creativity come from emotional, mindset or boundary setting work.
Creativity is something that we nurture in children as they are growing up. We encourage them to paint whatever they imagine, sing loud and off-key and tell stories that make no sense, leaving us beaming with pride and a sense of individuality. As we mature into adults this nurturing shifts to neglect for more ‘important things’ and the creative support we received as a child dwindles and ‘play’ turns into a feeling of creative guilt.
First, we need to clarify a huge difference between Creative shame vs Creative guilt
Creative Shame says:
I don’t deserve to create for myself because I’m not talented enough, I have many other things to do and I am a bad/selfish person for wanting to have this time.
Creative Guilt says:
There are many other things I could be doing with this time, could I be hurting/neglecting someone else by taking this time out for creating? It brings me so much happiness but I worry that it is a selfish thing to do.
Shame says you are bad/selfish while guilt is concern that an action you do may be bad/selfish.
Dr Brené Brown is a research professor who has spent the past two decades studying courage, vulnerability, shame, and empathy. In her words:
“I believe that guilt is adaptive and helpful – it’s holding something we’ve done or failed to do up against our values and feeling psychological discomfort.
"I define shame as the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging – something we’ve experienced, done, or failed to do makes us unworthy of connection. I don’t believe shame is helpful or productive. In fact, I think shame is much more likely to be the source of destructive, hurtful behaviour than the solution or cure.”
Ok, Jess, that sounds pretty life-changing but I still don’t get how my creative guilt can be positive? How can we use our creative guilt to set up a guilt-free and intentional time for creating?
These are my suggestions:
When Creative guilt says: There are many other things I could be doing with this time, could I be hurting/neglecting someone else by taking this time out for creating? It brings me so much happiness but I worry that it is a selfish thing to do.
Tell a close friend, partner or family member about your art/creativity learning aspirations and what it means to you in this stage of your life. Their understanding and creative support for you may give you the freedom to carve out time in a way that you don’t need to feel guilty because you know it is being supported by those that love and care for you and they don’t see it as selfish or hurtful.
Here your guilt has prompted you to make a connection and free yourself of worry in a way that sets up healthy parameters for time creating - that inner child feels free to go wild and get those paints out!
When Creative guilt says: Do I even have the time for this at all? My to-do list is so long, I don’t want to be neglecting my responsibilities in taking this time out for myself.
Audit your time and plan where possible. Later this month I’ll be doing a post on creating a basic project planning strategy because when time is slim you’ll want to know exactly what creative project to tackle when you have it! You don’t even necessarily need 3 hours - 20 minutes of creating can do you a world of good.
Look at your routine and what is reasonable, listen to your body and the time of the day you feel you’re most creative. There is no denying that even when we are at our busiest - there are at least a few moments we find ourselves distracted or doing something that we don't need - or want - to do. Trade your Instagram of Facebook scrolling time for creating you would be AMAZED by what can come out of it. Alternatively, plan your creative time around the points of the week where your demands are less like the weekend or early morning or evenings - maybe it’s your lunch break!
When Creative guilt says: Would I just be wasting my time? I’m not a professional artist and while I’m hugely excited about the idea of creating, is it worth the time just as a hobby?
In a novel written by Marthe Troly-Curtin one character states, “Time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.” Time and attention are our most precious and valued commodities and as so we attached a tremendous amount of pressure on it as possible and jam as much purpose and expectation we can squeeze out of every minute. BUT time to catch a breath, to be in the moment, to feel inspired and be in tune with mind, body and imagination is certainly not time wasted.
Even if you spend an hour painting with no finished result.
Even if you paint to create for just one person and no one else sees it.
Even if you’re the only one that sees what you make and it brings you joy.
None of this is waste, because creativity in its essence is gain - the more you use, the more you have.
When Creative guilt says: I feel it might be selfish to create just on my own?
If your guilt won’t let you embrace time on your own, and realistically this may just be a season in your life where you feel you can’t and you can’t break past the feeling of it being too self-indulgent (which it isn’t but I see where you are). Get your kids, partner or friend involved and create with them, it won’t be the same as being on your own but just sharing the joy of creating brings a lightness and adds a sparkle to the eyes of your own inner child as well as becoming about quality time with your family, friends or children. Creating with a friend can make you feel it’s about quality time, socialising and sharing and not just about you. Another means that guilt can prompt you to do something in line with your values and where you are in a healthy way that doesn’t actually leave you feeling guilty.
In essence, you can embrace your small amount of creative guilt and use it to prompt you to communicate and set healthy boundaries for creating within the life that doesn’t actually leave you feeling guilty. It’s completely normal for us to care about our productivity and time and be concerned for how we use it, as long as we don’t shame ourselves for wanting to express that creativity in a way that makes us feel undeserving.
Sincerely,
the painter that feels guilt too but is ever striving to use it to love more, create more and share more.